Thursday, February 25, 2010


Wait! Before you run away at the mention of looking at more of my terrible 'befores'... I promise they are not as terrible as before! Thanks for the comfort on the last ones Tammy :)

Well I have been shopping for an outfit and it brought a loooot of mixed feelings. I am the biggest I have ever been to my knowledge. A size 18! (XL,XXL) I am happy however because I am already beginning to work on my eating and weight issues and am devoted to change. So here goes a few pictures of my outfit if you are interested. It is not what I had in mind but I decided to go with pants because I got an awesome deal on them!

Entire outfit purchased at Ricki's (
Pants 10$ (were originally 59.99 but marked wayyy down)
White Blouse 35.50
Green 3/4 length sweater 39.50

Total 96.05

Not great for my unemployed student budget but I think I will get use out of the blouse and the sweater.Also I did resist buying a new purse which I need desperately!

Wooden Jewellery was 6.99 at a small cheap jewellery store. I hope it matches ok.

Black Bow Kitten Heels (Payless 5 years ago)

Do the pants look an ok length?They are the short variety. I am actually 5'10 but I have really short legs and a long torso.
And if you can see well enough to judge, do the shoes match ok?

Last picture is just for fun really. I plan on wearing my hair down and actually wearing makeup but I just haven't gotten around to doing it yet today (It is "Study Break" afterall...)

What do you think of it? Any comments are welcome. Sorry for going on about clothing for an entire entry but I need input if anyone has any. All my girls are gone away for winter break and I don't want to look like a freak. Haha!

Oh and one confession: I peeked at the scale early again! I have GOT to stop doing that! Even though it said I was down another 1.5 pounds, I will wait until Monday for the 'official' recording

Thanks for reading/listening to my long outfit anxiety!

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

I just want to feel good in my own skin...

How sad, I cannot remember the last time I have felt good in my own skin. Maybe childhood when I was filled with happiness,innocence and running free? Maybe after I finished one of those yo-yo diets and I felt good about myself?(comfortably seated in one-derland...)

With this in mind, I am more determined than ever to win the battle with the mirror, the scale, myself. I will love myself again. I will!

I have gone through my wardrobe and cannot find anything to wear in there for my school interview, so I have to go shopping for an outfit. Everything is too small or too old and worn looking. Perhaps this was a bad day to take these 'before pics' but here they come... (they are headless and the timestamp is wrong on my camera. I haven't showered and got dressed yet because its 5 a.m but at least I finally got them done)

[246.6 lbs]This was the dress I was considering wearing for my interview but find some sort of black jacket to formalize it (and some tall SPANX haha)

You might have noticed the hearts on my mirror. They have been there for a few monthes. I put them there as a reminder to try and love myself more everyday...

[246.6 lbs]This next set I chose because the shirt is one of those clingy varieties and it does not hide ANY chunk. Also you might notice that these pants don't even do up, so I was hoping to use them to better gauge how I am doing. ( Please ignore the panties, ha! I will understand if you run away..)There its all there for you to see..

[246.6 lbs] Okay, this set is rock bottom, and frankly the pants scare me, but at least they are buttoned.

Sorry for the exposure but its out of the way now, and we can pretend this viewing never happened? I will probably find every excuse to blog now and get these off the front page... so don't be suprised!!

Monday, February 22, 2010

Ten Down & More Good News!

Good news! I lost another 4.4 pounds this week (over 10 total), but even better news? I got a call from one of the schools I applied to. I have an interview this Saturday to enter an Education Program. Yes I am one more step closer a huge dream of mine: Teaching!

I was hoping interviews would be next month and also that I would be down more weight so I could pick out a nice new outfit. I have mixed feelings though because I would love to still get a new outfit but it will get too big too fast to enjoy it for long. However I do always feel more confident when I get to walk into a place wearing a nice and new outfit and that just might pay off...

So I am WEIGHING the pro's and cons. I would love something like this paired with a great pencil skirt...Or I could dig through my clothes and try to find something old... Decisions...decisions!!

Another doctors appointment tomorrow. The kitties are still enjoying my treadmill more than I am...

Sunday, February 21, 2010

Winter Break (Yay!)... Excercise Lag (Boo!)

This week I have done pretty well and I am looking forward to weighing in tomorrow but I'm very dissapointed because I haven't been able to 'step up' in the excercise department. I have developed an infected sweat gland in my armpit and its not pretty! I don't wear a lot of deoderant in the winter because I never sweat, and it takes a lot to make me sweat. I'm alwaayyys the cold one so I don't know how I got this way but I'm nervous about the doctor visit and what they will say regarding work outs. Anyhow its quite painful and I don't really want to aggravate it (if its possible to do so) by excercise. I am thinking I will just go for long walks everyday this week because its supposed to be cold (that way I won't sweat)

My cats are getting good use of the treadmill however. My computer decided to not allow me to put the pictures on my laptop, so I borrowed this from google, but you get the picture... (Oh how I love you google..)

On a good note, I have only used 3 of 35 flex points this week (I decided that I had to have 1/2 a serving of Baked Chips while watching the Amazing Race tonight) and I feel like I am adjusting well to the plan while going into week 3. My pants are starting to get a bit looser so thats a good sign!

It is Spring Break this week so I was hoping to intensify my work outs but I don't think this will happen now because of my gland issue. So frustrating. I will also face a challenge with a roadtrip that I am gonna go on for a few days but luckily I have a support system going with me who is also on WW. Eating on the go can be challenging but we are going to pack and plan ahead! However we're visiting other campuses so the pub situation could pose a challenge as well. I'm a picky drinker and love the sugary cocktails! (Uh oh!)

See you tomorrow for the WI results!!

Thursday, February 18, 2010

The Beginning

The change has been on the horizon for some time, but I have decided that the time for change is now. I began my healthy expedition nearly one week ago and I am excited to change my life. I have made far too many excuses in my life about not having the time to really eat, excercise, and live right but have now realized that it is important to make the time.

My self esteem is at an all time low and I weigh the most I ever have. I have come to the conclusion that I really need to feel more confident and less anxious about myself and hopefully by getting a healthy lifestyle going, I will receive a confidence boost and my anxiety will decrease.

I am a 23 year old female who will be graduating from University in May, and I am hoping get my Bachelor of Education started in September. In a society with obesity on the rise I believe that if I am going to be a teacher, than I should be able to better promote an healthy lifestyle if I am actually part of one myself.

I have recently become addicted to following Blogs and thought what a wonderful way it would be to keep track of my progress and meet people who are in a similar situation! I have begun the Weight Watchers Flex Plan and so far it is going really well. It seems like the right plan for me because I can truly enjoy the foods I like in moderation. Hopefully this will keep me on track!

So what next? Time to get the treadmill back out from where it is hiding behind the Christmas decorations and get moving!